Let me love you
I told y’all a girl was in love. Even with all the game that Zumba boy done laid on me, I can’t seem to get Derrick out of my mind. It is literally almost a year since we met, and I have just realized I have spent all year obsessing over a balcony session that probably wasn’t as mind blowing as my memory plays it out. I write this now, almost ashamed and proud of myself; I didn’t fuck him. Well something went down … but it wasn’t me.
Zumba boy being back in his own country I had time to recover from our last encounter, and even more time to do some more obsessing and dissecting of the f-boy’s last journal entry to me. I have read it over and over and I swear I could recite it if anyone asked me to right now. It just gets me… well, so horny. In like a romantic way. It’s like I’m sitting there soaking wet but with a chest boner too. So it was no surprise how hastily I replied his messages to the point of saying yes to him coming over. I knew what kind of mess I was getting myself into all too well but I have learned over the last year that when it comes to sex, SURRENDER!
There were no more words to be spoken, no more seconds to be wasted on a bunch of shoulda coulda woulda but didn’t. The only breath in me yearned to be reunited with his as we swapped heat form the desire burning within. He is such great company and never in my life did that ever make my knees weak, but with him it always did. What’s a girl to do if every bad feeling about a guy is countered with; a wave of chills every time he laughs, a sudden spill between my thighs when he pauses mid laugh to look at me, an untamable heartbeat when his hand grazes mine as he reaches for the rail. We were back at the balcony and all I could think was, I want to be here.
He didn’t say it but I felt it; regret. In the way that he pulled me to him and kissed my neck while he sank his face in it. He pressed my body against his as he slid my little dress up further along my thighs to my ass. I didn’t say a word to him nor did I push him away but he could feel the uncooperative 5% of my body that still had a lot of questions to ask.
“Just let me, let me lo…” he interrupted himself and pulled me from his chest, “let me make up for last time we were here”
I heard my phone go off in the room and run in to see who it was. I didn’t have to, I never would have but it was all just too intense for me to handle. I had unfinished conversations with Zumba boy so he was trying to pick up where we left off. One minute I’m explaining how I’m not in a committed relationship with a Derrick and the next, the same Derrick is laying me on the bed mid texting, pulls my legs apart and takes my pussy in his mouth.
I just turned my phone off, I mean… he was making it up to me the least I could do is be present.